Heather R | How friendships help me manage emotions

Heather R | How friendships help me manage emotions

The concept behind the Mental Health League is one that resonates with me so strongly because I place a huge amount of value on friendship. It is important to surround yourself with people who love and support you for who you are, while also constantly pushing you to be the best version of yourself. Understanding and taking control of your emotions isn’t always an easy task and it’s definitely not something you should have to take on alone. We all need our fans.

Since I can remember, I have had a hard time regulating my emotions and seeing myself in a positive light. It wasn’t until college that I started to really address this as a reality and actively work on ways to take control of my emotions. Freshman year was a hard time for me (as it is for many) and I got to the point where I would go to class, come home and nap in the dark, go to golf practice, nap in the dark some more, dinner and repeat. It wasn’t until I met my friend Anne (still a very close friend to this day) that I first started to open up about these feelings. The ability to acknowledge them and have someone to help pull me out of the darkness — literally — is something I will always and forever value. Anne has also never held back from speaking her mind and is constantly pushing me in ways she might not even realize. A comment she made to me ten years ago is still one that I think about regularly. She told me that I was scared to try or commit to things that I am not good at. At first, I got defensive, but upon further reflection, I understood exactly where she was coming from. She was absolutely right. I was — and still am — afraid to fail, and my tactic at the time was to avoid new challenges entirely. This comment (that she likely doesn’t even remember) is one that continued to push me to embrace change, push myself to learn new things, and most importantly, become comfortable with the fact that there is a learning curve in everything and that does not translate to failure.

Friendship isn’t always easy (just like any relationship) and the best friends aren’t the ones who support you blindly. Your best friends are the ones who love you unconditionally — but also call you out when you’re being irrational, are being too hard on yourself, or aren’t thinking about the other side of the conversation. Sometimes those are hard things to realize but these are the people who know you the best and it’s important to take their feedback to heart.

TLDR: It’s normal to feel like regulating your emotions is hard and that you constantly have to work on it (#nooffseason) BUT that doesn’t mean you have to do it all alone. Find your squad, be thoughtful and open about your moods, good and bad, acknowledge that fear and vulnerability are an important aspect of life and don’t ever feel shame in being human.

About The Author

Heather is Director of Wholesale @Poppin and always thinking about friendship, psychology, and the impact each has on business.

The views expressed in this article are the views of the author and do not necessarily represent the views of the Mental Health League. This content is for informational purposes only, even if and to the extent that this article features the advice of physicians and medical practitioners. This article is not, nor is it intended to be, a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment, and should never be relied upon for specific medical advice. If you need help, text HOME to 741 741 for 24/7, 365 support from the Crisis Text Line. Please follow our Community Guidelines when commenting below.

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